ARIES - Arrogant Rams Ignore Everything Sensible

TAURUS - Temperamental Asinine Unyielding Robust Udderly Slow

GEMINI - Ginormously Evil Mentally Incoherent Nerve-wracking Idiot

CANCER - Continuously Annoying Nagging Confused Emotional Reject

LEO - Loudmouth Egotistical Oaf

VIRGO - Vapid Irritating Rigid Grandly Obsessive

LIBRA - Lowlife Incessantly Braying Ritual Antagonism

SCORPIO - Sexually Coercive Overbearing Remarkably Power-hungry Intellectually Obtuse

SAGITTARIUS - Self-righteous Arrogant Grandiose Inane Trash Talking Arrogant Redundant Irresponsible Unstable Stooge
(yes I know we used Arrogant twice, that's intentional lol)

CAPRICORN - Capitalistic Ambitious Pigheaded Ratbastard Inherently Callous Overeager Restrictive Nightmare

AQUARIUS - Analytical Queerly Unemotional Aloof Repressed Inanimate Uberzealous Scientist

PISCES - Perpetually Irrational Sacrifice Crucified Encompassing Submission

(c)2005 TwiggyLit/JoyousHornedBovine
May not be reproduced or used without permission.
Writing credits go to SadMess (Josh) and X Praesaepe (Amy).